Surrogacy is a life-changing process that has enabled countless families to grow, but it remains one of the most misunderstood methods of family building. Misinformation about surrogacy creates stigma and confusion, often overshadowing the beautiful journeys it facilitates. By addressing and debunking common myths, we can shed light on this incredible option for parenthood and encourage open, informed conversations.
Here, we’ll explore seven common myths about surrogacy, diving deep into the facts to provide clarity and perspective.
Myth 1: A Baby Shares DNA with the Surrogate
One of the most common misconceptions about surrogacy is that the baby inherits genetic material and DNA from the surrogate. This belief stems from a misunderstanding of how surrogacy works.
In gestational surrogacy, the surrogate carries an embryo created through in-vitro fertilization (IVF) using the intended parents’ or donors’ egg and sperm. The surrogate provides a nurturing environment for the baby to develop but contributes no DNA. This clear separation between genetics and gestation ensures that the intended parents—or donors, in some cases—are the sole genetic contributors.
The confusion often arises when people hear about traditional surrogacy, a less common form in which the surrogate’s egg is used to conceive the child. Traditional surrogacy is rare and poses more legal and emotional challenges, which is why it’s increasingly replaced by gestational surrogacy. By understanding this distinction, it becomes clear that gestational surrogates do not share any genetic ties with the baby they carry.
Myth 2: Surrogates Only Do It for the Money
The idea that surrogates are motivated purely by financial gain is both simplistic and misleading. While surrogates receive compensation for their time, sacrifices, and dedication, their motivations often run much deeper.
Surrogates frequently describe their decision as an altruistic one. Many have witnessed friends or family members struggle with infertility and feel inspired to help others experience the joy of parenthood. Others see surrogacy as an opportunity to give back and make a profound impact on someone’s life.
Compensation is an important aspect of surrogacy—it acknowledges the surrogate’s physical and emotional labor, time away from work, and the significant responsibility of carrying someone else’s child. However, reputable agencies carefully screen surrogates to ensure their motivations are aligned with the emotional and ethical demands of the process.
Ultimately, surrogacy is not just a financial arrangement; it’s an act of generosity that requires dedication, empathy, and a deep commitment to helping others.
Myth 3: Surrogacy Is Illegal In Most Places
Surrogacy’s legal status varies greatly depending on where you live, leading to confusion about whether it’s a viable option. While some places have restrictive or unclear laws, others embrace surrogacy with clear regulations designed to protect everyone involved.
In the United States, for example, surrogacy laws differ state by state. California is a leader in surrogacy-friendly legislation, allowing compensated surrogacy and ensuring legal protections for intended parents and surrogates. New York recently updated its laws to permit compensated surrogacy under stringent guidelines, making it a viable option for many families.
Globally, countries like Canada, Ukraine, and Georgia also have well-established frameworks for surrogacy. However, in places like France and Germany, surrogacy remains illegal. This legal patchwork highlights the importance of consulting experienced legal professionals and agencies when considering surrogacy, especially across borders.
Far from being universally illegal, surrogacy is a legal, regulated option in many parts of the world, helping families achieve their dreams of parenthood.
Myth 4: Intended Parents Have No Legal Rights Until Birth
The idea that intended parents lack legal rights until after the baby is born is a common misconception, but it doesn’t reflect how surrogacy agreements work. In most cases, the legal rights of intended parents are established well before delivery.
Through pre-birth orders and parentage orders, intended parents are recognized as the baby’s legal guardians. These documents are typically issued by a court and clearly outline parental rights, often naming the intended parents on the baby’s birth certificate. This ensures that they can make medical decisions for the baby and take custody immediately after birth.
The process varies depending on the state or country, but in surrogacy-friendly jurisdictions, courts recognize the importance of establishing legal parentage early in the pregnancy. This provides peace of mind for all parties, ensuring a smooth transition once the baby is born.
By understanding the legal safeguards in place, intended parents can feel confident that their rights are protected throughout the surrogacy journey.
Myth 5: Surrogacy Is Only for the Wealthy
It’s true that surrogacy can be expensive, with costs of surrogacy often ranging from $70,000 to $180,000 in the United States. These expenses cover essential components like medical procedures, surrogate compensation, agency fees, legal documentation, and more. However, the perception that surrogacy is exclusively for the wealthy overlooks the many strategies intended parents use to make it accessible.
Some families save for years to afford surrogacy, while others seek loans, grants, or crowdfunding to help cover the costs. Additionally, shared-cost programs and flexible payment plans offered by agencies can make the process more manageable.
International surrogacy is another option, as certain countries offer surrogacy services at a lower cost without compromising on quality or ethical standards. However, this route requires thorough research to ensure legal and medical protections are in place.
While surrogacy is an investment, it is not out of reach for families with careful financial planning and support.
Myth 6: Surrogacy Is Exploitative
Critics of surrogacy sometimes frame it as an exploitative practice that takes advantage of women. However, ethical surrogacy is built on mutual respect, transparency, and rigorous safeguards to ensure all parties are protected.
Reputable surrogacy agencies prioritize the well-being of surrogates, ensuring they are fully informed about the process and enter into agreements voluntarily when becoming a surrogate. Surrogates are provided with independent legal counsel to advocate for their interests, and they receive fair compensation for their time, effort, and commitment.
Surrogates often describe the experience as empowering and deeply fulfilling. Many form strong, positive relationships with the intended parents and take pride in helping them achieve their dream of parenthood.
By working with ethical agencies and adhering to legal frameworks, surrogacy can be a collaborative and rewarding experience rather than an exploitative one.
Myth 7: Surrogacy Is a New and Unproven Concept
Surrogacy might seem like a modern phenomenon, but its roots go back centuries. In fact, the concept of surrogacy appears in ancient texts, including the Bible, where the story of Hagar and Abraham serves as one of the earliest examples.
Modern surrogacy began to take shape in the 1970s with traditional surrogacy arrangements. The introduction of IVF in the 1980s revolutionized the field, enabling gestational surrogacy and providing a clear separation between genetic and gestational roles.
Since then, advancements in reproductive medicine, legal protections, and ethical practices have refined the surrogacy process, making it safer and more reliable than ever. Today, surrogacy is a well-established option for family building, supported by decades of successful outcomes and satisfied families.
Surrogacy’s long history demonstrates its resilience and the profound impact it continues to have on countless lives.
Choose Surrogacy By Faith
Surrogacy is a powerful journey that brings hope and joy to families around the world. Despite its many successes, it remains shrouded in myths that can discourage people from exploring this path. By debunking these myths, we can foster greater understanding and appreciation for the surrogacy process. Whether you’re an intended parent, a potential surrogate, or simply someone curious about surrogacy, knowing the facts is essential. Share this blog to help others see through the misconceptions and embrace the truth about this remarkable path to parenthood.
Surrogacy By Faith is here to help. Our surrogates are motivated by family values and a desire to help intended parents build their perfect families. We also take the time to build our relationship with the surrogate, so she feels supported and heard every step of the way. If you’re interested in starting your surrogacy journey, fill out our surrogate form or intended parent form to get started! We’ll be with your every step of the way to help build the family of your dreams.