Surrogacy FAQ: Answers to the Most Common Questions

June 27, 2025

Surrogacy is a complex journey, and it’s natural to have a lot of questions whether you’re an intended parent or a woman thinking about becoming a surrogate. In this article, we’ve gathered the most frequently asked questions about surrogacy and organized them into clear themes so you can find the answers you need quickly. From what surrogacy really means to how compensation works, from legal rights to emotional considerations, you’ll find honest, thorough, and up-to-date information right here.

Each section reflects real concerns and search queries we’ve heard from both surrogates and intended parents. Whether you’re just beginning to explore the idea or actively preparing for your journey, this FAQ is designed to guide you at every step.

Frequently Asked Questions About Surrogacy

What is surrogacy?

Surrogacy is an arrangement in which a woman agrees to carry and give birth to a child on behalf of someone else, typically individuals or couples who are unable to have children on their own. These intended parents may face infertility, medical conditions, or may be same-sex couples or single parents by choice.

The surrogate, sometimes called a gestational carrier, undergoes medical procedures and commits to carrying the pregnancy, but she does not intend to keep parental rights over the child once it is born. The arrangement is typically formalized through a legal contract.

There are two main types of surrogacy:

Gestational surrogacy

This is the most common type of surrogacy today. The surrogate is not biologically related to the baby. An embryo is created through in vitro fertilization (IVF), using the egg and sperm of the intended parents or donors, and then transferred to the surrogate’s uterus. Because there is no genetic connection between the surrogate and the child, gestational surrogacy offers a clearer legal path in most jurisdictions.

Traditional surrogacy

In traditional surrogacy, the surrogate’s own egg is used, meaning she is the biological mother of the child. Fertilization typically happens through intrauterine insemination (IUI). This method is less common today due to the emotional and legal complexities it involves, especially when establishing parental rights after birth.

Surrogacy arrangements can be altruistic or compensated, depending on the country or state laws. In some places, only altruistic surrogacy is legal, meaning the surrogate is reimbursed only for pregnancy-related expenses, not paid for the act itself. In other regions, compensated surrogacy is fully legal and regulated.

The entire process involves medical, legal, and psychological preparation to ensure that all parties understand their rights, responsibilities, and expectations. When done ethically and with proper support, surrogacy can be a deeply rewarding experience for everyone involved.

What happens when the baby is born?

When the surrogate gives birth, the intended parents are typically present at the hospital to meet their child immediately. The process from surrogate birth to legal parenthood depends on the country or state and the agreements in place.

Here’s what usually happens:

Immediate handoff: After birth, the baby is handed over to the intended parents, who begin bonding right away. In many cases, the hospital staff is informed in advance and follows a birth plan that reflects the intended parents’ role.
Medical care: The baby receives routine newborn care, and the surrogate is also monitored to ensure her physical recovery. Some intended parents choose to stay close during this time to express gratitude and provide support.
Legal paperwork: Depending on the jurisdiction, a pre-birth or post-birth legal process may take place to establish the intended parents’ legal rights. This can involve a pre-birth order, a post-birth court hearing, or an adoption procedure.

Frequently Asked Questions About Becoming a Surrogate

How do I become a surrogate?

Becoming a surrogate involves a multi-step process to ensure that you are physically, emotionally, and legally prepared for the journey. Most surrogacy journeys, especially those managed through a surrogacy agency, follow these general steps:

Make sure you meet the basic requirements on how to qualify as a surrogate

Most agencies and fertility clinics follow medical and psychological guidelines. Common surrogate requirements include:

- Being between 21 and 40 years old (how old a surrogate has to be varies from one agency to another. Surrogacy By Faith sets the limit at 37 years old)
- Having given birth to at least one child
- Being physically and emotionally healthy
- Having a BMI typically between 19 and 32
- Living in a stable and supportive environment
- Being financially independent and not receiving public assistance
- Not smoking, using drugs, or abusing alcohol
Apply and complete the screening process

You’ll begin by submitting an application and going through a series of evaluations:
- Medical exams to confirm your ability to carry a pregnancy safely
- Psychological assessment to ensure emotional readiness
- Background checks for you and your partner, if applicable
Match with intended parents

Once approved, you’ll be introduced to intended parents based on mutual preferences and values. A good match includes compatible communication styles, expectations, and sometimes shared cultural or personal values.
Sign a legal contract

Each party has independent legal representation to draft and review a gestational carrier agreement. This contract outlines everyone’s rights, responsibilities, compensation terms, and decisions in case of complications.
Begin the medical process

You’ll take fertility medications to prepare your uterus, then undergo an embryo transfer at a fertility clinic. If the transfer is successful, you’ll continue with prenatal care as in a traditional pregnancy.
Carry the pregnancy and give birth

Throughout the pregnancy, you’ll attend regular medical appointments and remain in contact with the intended parents. After birth, the baby is placed with the intended parents, and you return home knowing you’ve helped grow a family.

What disqualifies you from being a surrogate?

Some medical, psychological, and lifestyle factors can prevent someone from becoming a surrogate. The following are common disqualifications:

Pregnancy-related complications in the past, such as preeclampsia, gestational diabetes requiring insulin, or preterm labor
Chronic health issues like uncontrolled hypertension, diabetes, or autoimmune disorders
Mental health conditions that are untreated or poorly managed, such as bipolar disorder or severe anxiety
Smoking, drug use, or recent substance abuse history
BMI outside the acceptable range, typically over 32
Financial dependence on government assistance
Lack of a strong support system, especially if you have young children at home
Living in a state or country where surrogacy is restricted or banned

Even if you have a minor issue on this list, every case is reviewed individually. In some cases, additional documentation or steps can help clarify eligibility.

Frequently Asked Questions About the Matching Process

Can I choose my intended parents?

Yes. Most surrogates are encouraged to take an active role in choosing the intended parents they’ll work with. Matching is not a one-sided decision. It’s a mutual process.

Here’s how it typically works:

Review of profiles: After completing your application and screening, you’ll be shown detailed profiles of intended parents who are looking for a surrogate. These may include information about their background, lifestyle, location, relationship status, family values, and sometimes a letter or video message.
Mutual preferences: You can express your own preferences, such as wanting to help a couple with children, working with a single parent, matching with LGBTQ+ families, or choosing someone local or international. Agencies will only present matches where both parties’ criteria align.
Introductory meetings: Once there’s a potential match, you’ll typically have a video call or meeting to get to know each other. This is a chance to ask questions and see if the connection feels right on both sides.
Final agreement: If both you and the intended parents agree to move forward, the match is confirmed and the legal and medical steps can begin.

Being matched with the right intended parents is one of the most important aspects of a positive surrogacy journey. Good communication, mutual respect, and shared expectations help lay the foundation for a smooth and emotionally fulfilling experience.

What happens if I’m not comfortable with the match?

If a potential match doesn’t feel right to you, you are absolutely allowed to decline.

Agencies and surrogacy professionals understand that this is a deeply personal journey. You’re not expected to move forward unless you genuinely feel a connection and trust with the intended parents. Saying no to a match simply means that the process continues until the right one comes along.

You may also realize during a meeting or after some reflection that your preferences have evolved. That’s normal too. Being honest about your boundaries and instincts helps create a healthier experience for everyone involved.

There’s no pressure to accept a match just because it’s offered. You deserve to feel respected, seen, and emotionally safe throughout the journey.

How long does the matching process take?

The length of the matching process can vary depending on several factors, including your preferences, location, and availability of intended parents looking for a surrogate with your profile.

In general:

Fast matches (within a few weeks) are possible when your preferences are flexible, and your medical and psychological screening is already complete.
Average time ranges from 1 to 3 months, especially if you have specific requests such as matching with a local family, LGBTQ+ couple, or intended parents who speak a certain language.
Longer waits may happen if you’re working independently without an agency, or if you’re matched through a small pool of intended parents.

During this time, you might be asked to update your profile or clarify some preferences. It’s also common to speak with several intended parents before finding the right fit. Even if it takes a little longer, most surrogates agree that finding the right match is worth the wait.

Frequently Asked Questions About Surrogate Compensation

How much do surrogates get paid?

Compensation for surrogates can vary depending on several factors, including location, experience, the agency or program you’re working with, and whether it’s your first journey or not.

In the United States, first-time surrogates typically receive between $35,000 and $50,000. Experienced surrogates, or those carrying for international intended parents or working in high-demand states like California, may receive $60,000 or more.

In addition to base pay, surrogates often receive additional compensation for specific milestones or circumstances, such as:

Monthly allowances during the pregnancy
Payments for embryo transfer procedures
Compensation for carrying multiples
Bedrest or recovery periods
Travel and childcare expenses
Maternity clothing allowance

Compensation is usually outlined in the surrogacy contracts before the process begins and is paid in installments throughout the pregnancy.

Do surrogates get paid if they miscarry?

Yes, in most cases, surrogates receive partial compensation if a miscarriage occurs, depending on how far along the pregnancy was and the terms of the legal agreement.

Typically:

If the miscarriage happens before the confirmation of pregnancy (around 6–7 weeks), compensation is limited to reimbursement for medications, appointments, and time spent.
If the pregnancy is confirmed but ends in the first trimester, surrogates may receive partial base compensation, along with any reimbursements already agreed upon.
If a loss happens later in the pregnancy, closer to the second or third trimester, a larger portion or sometimes the full amount of the base compensation may still be paid, depending on what’s specified in the contract.

The legal agreement signed before medical procedures begin will clearly outline how compensation is handled in the event of a pregnancy loss.

Is surrogate compensation taxable?

Whether or not surrogate compensation is taxable depends largely on the surrogacy laws of your country, your state, and how the payments are structured in your contract.

In the United States, there is no single national law that clearly defines how surrogate compensation should be taxed. However, in most cases:

Compensation is considered taxable income by the IRS unless the payments are structured as reimbursements for actual expenses only.
If you receive a lump sum or scheduled payments for your participation as a surrogate, that money may be classified as income even if you don’t receive a 1099 form.
Some intended parents or agencies may offer to cover the cost of working with a tax advisor to help you plan ahead.
Reimbursements for things like travel, medications, or lost wages may not be taxed if they are documented properly, but this isn’t guaranteed.

Because tax situations can vary and change from year to year, it’s strongly recommended that surrogates speak with a tax professional to get personalized advice. Doing so can help you avoid surprises and prepare for any potential obligations.

What does surrogate compensation usually include?

Surrogate compensation typically goes beyond just a base payment. Most surrogacy arrangements include a full compensation package designed to cover the surrogate’s time, effort, and out-of-pocket expenses throughout the journey.

Common components include:

Base compensation: A fixed amount paid in installments during the pregnancy.
Monthly allowance: A regular payment for routine expenses related to the pregnancy, such as transportation and self-care.
Embryo transfer fee: A one-time payment for undergoing the embryo transfer procedure.
Maternity clothing allowance: A budget to purchase pregnancy-related clothes and essentials.
Payment for carrying multiples: If you’re carrying twins or more, you may receive additional compensation.
C-section fee: An added payment in case a cesarean delivery is required.
Lost wages: If you miss work due to medical appointments, complications, or postpartum recovery.
Childcare and housekeeping: Reimbursements if you need help with children or household duties during bedrest or medical recovery.
Post-birth recovery pay: Some agreements include a recovery bonus or extended support after delivery.

The exact breakdown will vary depending on your contract, agency, and location, but these elements are often negotiated in advance and guaranteed in writing.

Frequently Asked Questions About the Surrogacy Process

How long does the surrogacy process take?

The full surrogacy process from the first application to delivery typically takes 12 to 18 months, although it can vary depending on several factors.

Here’s a general timeline:

Screening and approval: This includes your application, medical exams, psychological evaluations, and background checks. It usually takes 1 to 2 months.
Surrogate matching process with intended parents: This stage can go quickly or take several months, depending on how specific your preferences are and the availability of intended parents.
Legal contracts: Once matched, both parties work with separate attorneys to draft and sign the surrogacy agreement. This usually takes 2 to 4 weeks.
Medical preparation and embryo transfer: You’ll take fertility medications for a few weeks to prepare for embryo transfer. After transfer, a pregnancy is confirmed about 10 to 14 days later.
Pregnancy and delivery: A full-term pregnancy lasts about 9 months. Throughout this time, you’ll attend regular medical checkups and stay in touch with the intended parents.

Delays can happen, especially if there are challenges with matching, legal reviews, or unsuccessful transfers. But overall, most journeys fall within a 1 to 1.5-year window.

What medical procedures are involved in surrogacy?

Becoming a surrogate involves several important medical steps to ensure that your body is prepared for pregnancy and that the embryo transfer is successful.

Here’s what to expect:

Initial medical evaluation: A fertility specialist will assess your reproductive health. This includes a physical exam, blood tests, ultrasounds, and screening for infectious diseases.
IVF medication: You’ll take hormone medications (like estrogen and progesterone) to prepare your uterus to receive the embryo. These are usually given as pills, patches, or injections over several weeks.
Embryo transfer: The embryo is placed in your uterus through a simple, painless procedure at a fertility clinic. It usually doesn’t require anesthesia and takes just a few minutes.
Pregnancy confirmation: About 10 days after the transfer, blood tests will confirm whether implantation was successful. If it is, you’ll continue taking medications for several weeks to support the pregnancy.
Prenatal care: Once the pregnancy is stable, you’ll transition to standard care with an OB/GYN and attend regular checkups, ultrasounds, and screenings.

Some journeys may also involve additional procedures, like mock cycles, repeat transfers, or special monitoring depending on your health and medical history.

Do I have to travel for appointments?

In most surrogacy journeys, some travel is required, especially during the early stages. Whether or not you’ll need to travel depends on the location of the fertility clinic used by the intended parents and the agreement you’ve made.

Here’s what to expect:

Initial medical screening often takes place at the fertility clinic chosen by the intended parents. You may need to travel out of state if the clinic isn’t near your home.
Embryo transfer is always done at the fertility clinic, and it may involve staying overnight or for a few days depending on travel distance and doctor’s advice.
Prenatal care is usually local. Once the pregnancy is confirmed and considered stable, you’ll see an OB/GYN near your home for the rest of the pregnancy.

All travel, lodging, meals, and related expenses are covered by the intended parents as outlined in your surrogacy contract.

What happens if the embryo transfer doesn’t work?

It’s possible that the first embryo transfer doesn’t result in pregnancy. This can be disappointing, but it’s a common part of the IVF process even when everything is done correctly.

If the transfer fails:

You’ll stop taking medications and have a follow-up with the fertility clinic.
The medical team may adjust the treatment plan for the next attempt (for example, by changing hormone levels or timing).
You and the intended parents will discuss next steps together. If there are more embryos available, another transfer can usually be scheduled after a short break.

Most contracts include coverage for at least two or three transfer attempts, so one failed cycle doesn’t mean the journey is over. Many successful surrogacy stories include one or more failed transfers before a healthy pregnancy is achieved.

Frequently Asked Questions About Legal Rights and Responsibilities

Can a surrogate keep the baby?

In gestational surrogacy, the surrogate has no legal or biological connection to the baby. The embryo is created using the egg and sperm of the intended parents or donors, not the surrogate. Because of this, legal agreements and court orders are put in place before the birth to ensure that the intended parents are recognized as the child’s legal guardians.

Once the legal contract is signed and a pre-birth order or post-birth order is issued (depending on the state or country), the surrogate has no parental rights. She cannot change her mind after birth, and she does not have the option to keep the baby.

That said, laws vary by region. In some places where surrogacy laws are less developed or where traditional surrogacy is practiced (using the surrogate’s own egg), there may be more legal complexity. But in a professionally managed gestational surrogacy arrangement, the law is designed to protect all parties and to ensure the child goes home with the intended parents. Each U.S. state sets its own rules about surrogacy, creating a patchwork of laws and restrictions, as reflected on the surrogacy law map

What legal documents are required in a surrogacy journey?

Several key legal documents are used to protect everyone involved in the surrogacy process. These include:

Gestational carrier agreement: This is the main contract between the surrogate and the intended parents. It outlines the responsibilities of each party, the compensation structure, medical decisions, confidentiality, and what will happen in case of complications or unexpected events (like bedrest, multiple pregnancy, or premature birth). Each party is represented by their own attorney to ensure fairness and clarity.
Parentage orders: In many U.S. states, a pre-birth order is issued by the court, declaring the intended parents as the legal parents of the child before the birth. In other regions, a post-birth court procedure or adoption may be required after the delivery.
Other legal paperwork: Depending on the situation, there may also be HIPAA waivers, insurance declarations, and travel consent forms to sign during the journey.

It’s essential that all legal documents are finalized before any medical procedures begin. This provides peace of mind and legal protection for both the surrogate and the intended parents throughout the entire process.

Choose Surrogacy By Faith

At Surrogacy by Faith, respect for life is a core value. Except in cases of medical emergency or rare exceptional circumstances, pregnancy termination is not supported or permitted. This commitment, rooted in an ethic of care and responsibility, provides a reassuring framework for those seeking a surrogacy journey grounded in meaning, compassion, and integrity.

For intended parents considering surrogacy, the best way to start the journey is by exploring the intended parent application process. Women interested in becoming surrogates can learn more about the steps involved by reviewing the surrogate mother application process.